Fan-Art:

Notes: Co-written with Undomiel as I really can't write explicit slash. Will eventually become part of Dream and Reality. The pairing in this short piece *lol* is Glorfindel / Erestor (several others are hinted at). Special thanks to SayAye for drawing the wonderful picture "Lost" for me and thus inspiring me for part of this ficlet *hugs*

Translation of Elvish: Mellonen - my friend. Peredhel - half-elf. Seron vell - beloved. Melin chen - I love you. Derithon achen - I will wait for you. Nanarad ad'ovadim - until we meet again. Melethen - my love.

"Too much water, that's what I'd say, Mr Frodo. It's simply too much water." Sam glared at the ship as if he could make it disappear. "I really don't feel happy about this. No, not at all. You know those elves. Think they know everything. But I've heard tales of rough sea and drowning sailors..."

Despite his own nervousness, Frodo started to chuckle, "Oh Sam. Círdan knows what he's doing. He's been making this journey for ages. Nothing is going to happen to us." Turning towards to only other person on the landing stage, he asked, "Am I not right, Lord Glorfindel?"

The brooding elf was startled at realizing that the two hobbits were staring at him, obviously waiting for him to say something. They had been talking about the Mariner he believed, so he ventured to reply, "Do not fear for your friend, Master Samwise. Círdan is an experienced sailor. Nothing will befall their journey. And Ulmo will watch over them. After all, Mithrandir will be on the ship as well..." Yes, the Grey Pilgrim, as some had called him for ages, would sail home, and with him so many of his friends.

But he would stay behind to watch over the twins and Arwen. Elrond's daughter had seen it fit to fall in love with yet another human after Aragorn had found his destiny in the arms of the Wraith Slayer. Elladan and Elrohir had decided to remain in Arda until their sister and her by now husband would sail as well. Faramir of Gondor had been granted the privilege to set foot onto the Undying Lands by the Valar. As a reward for his deeds during the Ringwar. And, as the Twins put it, for sticking to Arwen after Aragorn had been so wise to drop her like a Morgul blade.

Celeborn would sail later as well, so would Rúmil and Orophin, both of them unable to leave their lovers behind. Not that the Twins would let them leave. Legolas would settle in Rohan to be with, Glorfindel still shuddered at the thought of being with someone this hairy, King Éomer until they, too, would sail into the West. Two humans in Valinor, may the Valar help them.

And he would leave these shores. He, who had captured his heart a long time ago. How could he have been so blind not to see before it had been too late. Before Glorfindel had failed him, had allowed for Ecthelion to fall at the hands of Gothmog. He could still see the tearstained face of his beloved, still hear his breaking voice begging him to take care of the dark-haired warrior... But he had been too slow, had not reached Ecthelion's side fast enough, before it was too late.

When he had returned to Arda and faced those dark eyes again, it was all he could do not to come undone and beg the Valar to release his soul from its prison that was his reborn body. His beloved was still grieving, mourning the loss of his sibling. Only very slowly had he allowed Glorfindel into his life again, and the Balrog Slayer treasured every moment spent with the dark-haired elf, even though he wanted them to be so much more than friends. But he had no right to ask, his guilt ever present. Why had he been reborn and not Ecthelion?

"Lord Glorfindel?" The soft touch of a small hand brought him out of his musings. Glancing down, his eyes locked with Frodo's, "You will watch over Sam and Rosie, and Merry and Pippin, won't you?"

The Balrog Slayer smiled weakly, "Of course. Nothing shall befall them while I am around." And this time he would hold true to that promise. He would not let Frodo down like he had his raven-haired love. Watching Anor's light fade into darkness, he excused himself and went into the house that, for the night, harboured those who would sail and those who would stay behind.

Glorfindel intended to take refuge in his rooms, but unfortunately someone had other plans. "Lord Glorfindel," the tone of Elrond's voice did not bode well, "I wish to talk to you about something." Sighing, the golden-haired Elda turned and motioned for Elrond to lead the way. Better get it over with.

---

"You have to tell him. If not for yourself then for him. He deserves to know." This was getting old. How often had Elrond asked him to do just this, and had he ever heeded his words? What was so special about this time? "He will leave Arda tomorrow, and who knows when next you shall see him?" Ah, there it was. Yes, he would leave Glorfindel behind. But maybe the separation would make everything easier for the Balrog Slayer.

"I do not think I shall, Lord Elrond." Sighing, he caught the stormy gaze of the Peredhel and explained, "Why should I tell him how much he means to me if all I ever brought him was heartache and hurt? It is because of me that Ecthelion is dead..."

Raising his hand, Elrond stopped the Elda, "It was not your fault. I have told you a hundred times that you could not have helped him no matter what. He himself had stationed you by the City Gates to try and get as many elves out of Gondolin as possible. He wanted you save ... and happy, I am sure of it." Taking a trembling hand in his, he asked gently, "Do you not think that he deserves to be loved?"

Glorfindel raised startled blue eyes and gazed at Elrond in puzzlement. "It is I who does not deserve to be loved. Not after what happened..."

"We are going in circles..." Or maybe not if his plan was working out. He just hoped that Melpomaen had found his Advisor on time and brought him to Elrond's door. Then he would be hearing what Glorfindel would say next. "I think you simply do not feel enough for him or else you would grant him a word in this as well."

Infuriated, Glorfindel spat out, "I love Erestor! You know that I do!" More quietly he added, "But I am not worthy of him..."

"Please reconsider. This might be your last chance for some time." Turning his head away from his Seneschal so that he would not see his smile, Elrond added, "I bid you good night," and thus dismissed the Balrog Slayer.

---

A dark figure was quickly hiding in the shadows of the hallway when Glorfindel stepped out of Elrond's chambers. Dark eyes sparkled madly, and a low voice murmured, "So very nice of you to grant me the right to choose, mellonen..."

---

Glorfindel sat on his bed, Elrond's words repeating themselves in his head time and again. Was the Peredhel right? Should he finally admit his feelings to the advisor before they parted ways tomorrow? But what good could possibly come of him remembering the pity in Erestor's eyes for the rest of his life? Or worse - the anger. The contempt. For that was all Erestor would feel if he knew the true extend of the feelings Glorfindel harboured for him. The person who had allowed his beloved brother to die.

A knock at his door startled Glorfindel out of his dark thoughts, and he groaned inwardly. He really did not want to speak to anyone at the moment, but he hardly could just ignore the person that demanded his attention. It could be something important, after all. He only hoped it was not Elrond with even more kind advice for him.

Reluctantly unlocking and opening the door, he did not even have time to voice a question as he was roughly pushed back inside his room by an obviously fuming Erestor. Wide-eyed, the Balrog-Slayer could only stare at the normally gentle and restrained advisor. Never before had he seen him behave or look like this.

Erestor's dark eyes were literally blazing, alight with an untameable fire that seemed to come from the depth of his soul. The usually neat hair was dancing wildly around his frame, looking vaguely unruly, as if Erestor had repeatedly worked his hands through it. Some of the raven strands fell across his face, giving him a rather feral appearance. His whole demeanour spoke of barely constrained fury, making him look even more ethereal than usual. To Glorfindel, he had never looked more beautiful and enticing.

However, before the blond elf could not dwell on this thought any further, Erestor gave him another hard push, almost sending him sprawling to the floor. Glorfindel began getting worried now, and he opened his mouth to inquire after the other's odd behaviour. He never got the opportunity to express his concern, though, as Erestor began speaking with a voice that was as cold as ice.

"When were you planning on telling me, Glorfindel? Or did you plan on not telling me at all?" Confused, Glorfindel could only stare at Erestor, not sure what the other was referring to. Seeing the blond's puzzled expression, a bitter smirk appeared on Erestor's face as he advanced further on his prey.

"I accidentally happened to overhear your earlier discussion with Lord Elrond..." Seeing Glorfindel's suddenly panic-stricken face, his smile vanished, and he went on, voice devoid of any humour. "Tell me, Glorfindel, when were you going to tell me? Were you even planning to?"

Glorfindel's mouth opened and closed several times, but no sound managed to escape, and finally he turned away, unable to face his secret love any longer. Walking over to the window, he stood with his back to Erestor, the distance making it somehow easier to voice what was inside his heart.

"I honestly do not know, Erestor. I wished to tell you many times, but my courage always seemed to desert me once I was in your presence." A harsh chuckle escaped him as his damp eyes studies the beauty that was the calm sea. "Facing the Balrog appeared almost easy in comparison at times." His voice choked then, and he had to swallow repeatedly before was able to go on. "But to answer your question, no, I probably would not have told you about my feelings. And maybe it would have been for the best had you never found out."

A hand on his shoulder startled him momentarily. He was spun around abruptly, only to come once again face to face with the angry advisor." Why? Why do you believe it best to keep me oblivious of your feelings? You are obviously hurting, so why did you not confide in me? What are you afraid of?"

Glorfindel squeezed his eyes shut, and a lone tear slowly made its way down his cheek. He wanted to turn away once more, but Erestor's hands gripped him with surprising strength. So he simply hung his head as he whispered hoarsely, "I did not want to see the pity in your eyes."

The gasp that followed made him look up again, and he noticed that Erestor's eyes had lost most of their angry sparkle, and were now filled with puzzlement. "Pity? Why ... why would I feel pity for you?" Not receiving an answer, he went on. "Why do you believe that, Glorfindel? Love is never to be pitied; it is something that should be cherished whenever it appears. I would never have..."

Erestor stopped in concern as he became aware of more tears leaking out of the Balrog-Slayer's eyes. Glorfindel wiped them away angrily, mentally chiding himself for showing such weakness. But if Erestor wanted to hear the truth, he would abide by his wishes. It did no longer matter now, anyway.

Looking at the raven-haired elf with hooded eyes, he sighed. "How could you feel anything other than pity in the face of my miserable behaviour? I have no right to burden you with my emotions after all that has happened. I understand if you are angry, you have every right to be." He was unable to meet Erestor's eyes as he spoke, so he did not see the astonished expression pass across the advisor's features.

This did not make any sense to Erestor so far, but he was determined to find out what was bothering his friend in such a way. Slowly, he raised his hand to gently cup Glorfindel's cheek, forcing him to meet his eyes. "Why do you feel this way? I do not remember you ever causing me harm of any kind ... please help me understand."

Glorfindel had begun to tremble slightly under the tender caress. He tried to resist, but confronted with those dark pleading eyes, he felt his resolve begin to crumble. Embarrassed at feeling another tear slide down his face, he decided to be completely honest with Erestor. After all, he deserved nothing but the truth.

More tears started to flow as he tried to explain. "I ... I am so sorry. I tried, I tried so hard, but I could not ... I was not fast enough ... could not get to him fast enough..." Erestor was unable to make any sense of the other's desperate attempts, and he finally put a finger to Glorfindel's mouth, effectively silencing him.

"What do you mean? You were unable to get to ... who?" Squeezing his eyes shut tightly, Glorfindel barely managed to whisper in a miserable voice, "Ecthelion."

Erestor appeared puzzled for a moment longer before his face cleared suddenly. Shock coursed through him, and a sick feeling settled in the pit of his stomach as he realized that Glorfindel obviously blamed himself for Ecthelion's death. He probably had done so all this time.

The advisor was jolted out of his shock as he felt Glorfindel struggling weakly, obviously desperate to get away. Gazing at the dejected, tear-stained face of the one who meant so much to him, he decided that he could not let that happen. Raising his other hand as well, and ignoring Glorfindel's slight flinch, he used both hands to cup the blond's face, causing him to focus on him again.

"Glorfindel, please listen to me. What happened back then was not your fault. Do you understand? You could have done nothing to prevent my brother's death. You had to fight for your own life, and the lives of the people under your command. You could do nothing to prevent this death." Seeing the disbelief in Glorfindel's eyes, he tried once more. "Glorfindel, you died trying to defend your people, as did he. None of what happened was your fault."

Erestor watched the struggle on Glorfindel's face, saw him battle the guilt that had had centuries to gain a firm hold over him. The tears had started flowing once again, and he gently wiped them away as he waited for a reaction. When the blond finally spoke, though, it was not that Erestor had expected. "Why could the Valar not have granted Ecthelion a second chance instead of me? Why me?"

The choked voice almost broke Erestor's heart, and he felt tears forming in his eyes as well. "No. Glorfindel, do not feel guilty for having been granted a second chance. True, I would have been delighted would they have returned Ecthelion to me, but never at your expense. Never. I am only glad that you were returned to me..." He added the last in a whisper, tenderly caressing Glorfindel's damp cheek as he spoke.

However, he could still see that Glorfindel was trying to resist the truth he had just told him. He still tried to take the blame upon himself. So Erestor did the only thing that might break through Glorfindel's barrier.

Glorfindel was not sure what was happening as he suddenly felt incredibly soft lips against his, and a questing tongue gently tracing his mouth. I took his mind a few moments to fully realize that this was Erestor kissing him, demanding entrance. This had to be some kind of dream, or one of the Valar wanted to have some fun at his expense. This could not be real. Erestor had never shown any indication of returning his feelings, and he should really try to resist, to break free, but oh ... these lips felt so divine. And if this was only another dream, he never wanted it to end.

Erestor smiled against Glorfindel's lips as he felt the other finally ceasing his internal struggling and relax against him. Once more his tongue sought entry to Glorfindel's mouth, and this time the other's lips parted, allowing him to delve in and taste the blond for the very first time.

Glorfindel moaned softly as he felt Erestor's tongue stroking over his own, teasing and arousing him at the same time. He savoured the sweet taste of the other and basked in Erestor's musky scent. A hand slowly wove itself through his waist-long hair, and Erestor tilted his head back to gain better access, caressing the roof of Glorfindel's mouth, stroking over his teeth and playing with his tongue.

Glorfindel felt like he was drowning in the kiss, growing more breathless by the moment but not caring in the least, wishing this wonderful sensation would go on forever. But nature demanded their attention, and they finally broke apart, both panting for breath and staring deeply into each other's eyes.

Erestor smiled at seeing the confused look in the other's beautiful azure eyes, and he gently caressed his face once more, giving him the time he needed to work through his conflicting emotions. Glorfindel just stared at Erestor, afraid to believe what the dark, bottomless eyes were telling him. He could see desire there, and affection, and ... love. By the Valar...

Erestor's smile widened as he saw the realization enter Glorfindel's eyes. Twining their fingers together, he lifted the strong hand to his lips, bestowing a kiss on each of the knuckles. "Yes, I feel deeply for you as well. I always have. I have also loved you for a long time now."

Glorfindel was terribly confused by now. "How... Why..." But again Erestor placed a finger against his lips, silencing him. "Do not let us discuss this now. We can do that when there is more time. Only know that I love you. I have for a long time, and I will love you until Arda comes to an end. But I will leave with Elrond tomorrow. I have to, and we will not see each other for some time. Let me show you how much I love you tonight, so the memory may sustain us in the lonely years to come."

Mutely, Glorfindel nodded, a joy he had never known before slowly finding its way inside his heart, gradually replacing the guilt that had resided there for so many years. It would be hard to let Erestor go now that he had finally found him, but simply knowing that his love was returned would help him carry on until they would be reunited again.

Seeing the acceptance in Glorfindel's eyes, Erestor let his hands glide down the blond's throat until they reached the fastenings of his tunic. Smiling sweetly at his love, he then slowly, almost reverently opened the fastenings one by one, drinking in the sight of the pale, perfect skin that was revealed.

Finally the garment hung open, and Erestor pushed it smoothly down Glorfindel's arms until it landed on the ground behind him. Licking his lips as he took in the Balrog-Slayer's well-muscled upper body, he could no longer resist and leaned in to run his tongue over the enticing skin.

Glorfindel shuddered as he felt Erestor's lips on his heated skin, and he moaned as he felt them close around a nipple, suckling gently. After paying the same attention to the other nipple, Erestor straightened up again, pleased to see the dilated pupils of the other. Both were aroused by now, and could barely wait to get closer, to share their love on every level imaginable.

Slowly they divested each other of their remaining clothing, all the while caressing and teasing until they were moaning softly, bare bodies touching as they pressed close together, hands stroking wherever they could reach. More heated kisses followed, and they could feel their love surrounding them like a protective blanket.

Somewhere between kissing and touching, they had the presence of mind to move to the bed, and soon they found themselves lying on top of the soft covers, kissing and rubbing against each other in an age-old rhythm.

Glorfindel let his hands trail up Erestor's back as his lover lay on top of him, pressing him into the mattress. He loved the feeling of the surprisingly strong body moving against his, to feel the muscles moving in his back and arms. Finally, his hands rested on Erestor's round buttocks, and he thrust sharply against the raven-haired elf, making him gasp into his mouth.

Erestor broke the kiss and looked down at the blond elf, love evident in his gaze. "What do you want, seron vell? What do you desire?" Glorfindel did not have to think long before answering. "I want to feel you. All of you, in me. I want us to be as close as possible. Please, let me feel you..."

Erestor's breath hitched as he heard Glorfindel give voice to what was also his deepest desire. He felt the fire inside himself, burning him, urging him to possess his lover, to make him his and never let him go.

"Yes." Was all he uttered before kissing Glorfindel passionately once more. However, reason returned enough to realize something. "Wait... We will need...." He did not even have to finish, because Glorfindel had already rolled to his side, searching for something beside the bed. Finally, he came up with a small flask and showed it proudly to Erestor. At the other's questioning glance, he admitted sheepishly, "It is some kind of oil. I use it to take care of my weapons, but it should suit our purposes, nonetheless."

Grinning and nodding, Erestor took the small bottle out of Glorfindel's hand before kissing him once more. He then sat back, urging his beloved to turn over while he opened the bottle, sniffing at its content curiously.

Glorfindel felt his heart begin to beat even faster, and heat settled inside the pit of his stomach as he rolled over, presenting his back to his new lover. Erestor carefully used the oil to prepare him, adding one finger after another until he was completely sure that there would only be minimal discomfort for his partner. Then he used even more oil to prepare himself, before putting the bottle at a safe place.

Erestor bent down and slowly ran his tongue along Glorfindel's neck and down his spine, causing him to shiver. Leaning in further, he whispered seductively, "Turn around, beloved. I want to see your face when we make love for the first time." Glorfindel complied instantly, and soon he was lying on his back once more, Erestor resting between his spread thighs as they kissed languidly.

Never ceasing the gently caress of the other's mouth, Erestor carefully slid a hand down to position himself. He tightly entwined his fingers with Glorfindel's and started pushing carefully, swallowing his lover's moan of pleasure and never ceasing until he was buried completely inside the love of his life.

Glorfindel broke the kiss and stared at Erestor in wonder. He had had lovers before, both male and female, but never had it felt like this. He felt complete for the first time in his life, and he could see the sensation mirrored in the almost black orbs of the elf above him.

After another moment of shared bliss, Erestor finally began to move, causing the lovers to groan at the sensations coursing through them. Glorfindel twined his fingers in the loose dark mane as his legs wrapped around Erestor's waist, his heels digging into the small of his back as he urged him to go faster, deeper.

Soon they had established a rhythm, and their sweat slicked bodies slid against each other, trapping Glorfindel's erection between them and creating delicious friction. The two lovers stared at each other as they moved, not once breaking the gaze that was so deeply etched with love even as they neared their climax. Stroking deeper and harder inside his beloved, Erestor reached down to take hold of Glorfindel's already leaking shaft, and he pumped it in counterpoint to his thrusts until he felt he other begin to tremble.

Glorfindel gasped, his beautiful features contorting as he felt his climax building inside him. Letting go of Erestor's hair, he clutched his lover's shoulders, holding on for dear life as he felt pleasure ripple through his body, burning in his veins and pooling in his lower belly. Forcing his eyes open again, he locked gazes with Erestor, wanting to see him when he climaxed, wanting to see him come undone with the pleasure he was giving him.

Erestor felt his own climax approaching, and he thrust a few more times into the shuddering body beneath him. He felt Glorfindel contract around him, and he increased his strokes, feeling hot semen splatter across his fingers and onto their bellies as Glorfindel climaxed with a shout, his head thrown back and his back arching in ecstasy.

Unable to hold on any longer as Glorfindel's spasms milked him, Erestor gave in to his body's demands and climaxed violently, crying out his lovers name again and again as he spent himself into the one he loved more than life itself.

After long moments of shared pleasure, Erestor slumped on top of Glorfindel, panting and gasping for breath, a feeling of deep contentment working its way through his whole being. Glorfindel pulled the pliant body of his lover closer, Erestor's head tucked under his chin as he basked in the afterglow of the most powerful climax he had ever experienced.

They lay like this for endless minutes, each comfortable in the other's presence. No words were needed to convey the depth of their feelings. Finally, it was Glorfindel who sighed an uttered the first whispered words.

"I wish you would not have to go tomorrow, but I know that you must. Elrond would be completely helpless without you." A muffled chuckle from Erestor assured him of the other's attention. "I have never felt like this before, and I know without a doubt that our love will survive the coming separation. But I will still miss you, and long for you in the many lonely nights that are to come."

Erestor finally raised his head, and looked deeply into his beloved's azure eyes. "I will miss you as well. But know that the memory of this night will sustain us in the coming years, and take comfort in the knowledge that it will not be long before we will be together again. And then nothing will ever be able to separate us." A sly smile crept across his face as he kissed Glorfindel on the nose. "But we still have the rest of tonight, and I suggest we make as many good memories as we can."

His smirk was then answered by Glorfindel's, and the Balrog-Slayer pulled him up to kiss him passionately once again.

---

With the cold light of the morning sun, the moment of separation had come. Glorfindel and Erestor stood wrapped in each other's arms on the dock, drinking in the sight of the other. "I wish I could stay..." the raven-haired advisor whispered, tears appearing in his dark eyes. Pulling him tighter still, the blond Balrog Slayer replied, "But you cannot do that." With a chuckle he added, "Elrond would not survive for a minute without you."

"I heard that." Spinning around, the two lovers found themselves face to face with the beaming Peredhel. "I see that my plan worked out at last." Gasping, Glorfindel managed to whisper, "Plan?" before returning to give his own interpretation of a carp. Nodding, Elrond replied, "I have had enough of the two of you. Both pining for each other, and both too stupid to act on your feelings..." Before either of the two could protest, he added, "I am so glad for you, though your timing could have been better." With that, he turned on his heels and boarded the ship that would take them to Valinor.

Erestor chuckled lowly, "He is right, of course. I was... I was afraid that you would turn me down. After all the lovers you had in Gondolin, I felt that I could never..." Silencing his beloved with a kiss, Glorfindel whispered after breaking away, "You are all that they were not. I only wish I had seen it then."

"Melin chen, Glorfindel," Erestor was slowly letting go of the Balrog Slayer and moved towards the ship, "derithon achen."

---

When the ship was no longer visible, even to his Elven eyes, Glorfindel turned to the three hobbits still standing on the dock, gazing into the distance. "Allow me to escort you home?" Almost silently, he added with a final glance over his shoulder, "Nanarad ad'ovadim, melethen."