Chapter 32 - Preparing for Battle

Justin

"Claire, don't worry. I'll call a friend of mine first thing on Monday, and he'll look into this whole mess." Yes. That's Mel how we all love her. But I don't think her calming qualities are much of a consolation for Brian's sister right now. I don't understand their mother, I really don't. How can you turn on your own children? Oh, right. Jack Kinney did, and so did my father once he found out about my being gay. Fuck, he actually attacked Brian! And threw me out of the house. Let's not forget about that. But this... It's worse. "Remember that the boys are old enough to form their own opinions about things. Youth Welfare is going to listen to them. And there's no way in hell that they are going to say that they want to get away from you. A few months ago – maybe. But now... It's no longer a possibility, and you know it." Mel is right, of course. But I'm not sure John and Peter's statements will be enough.

Claire is still sniffling, her eyes red and puffy. "What if they listen to her? What if her testimony will weigh more? The boys are just kids in their eyes, aren't they? And she is supposed to be the adult here. No one will believe us when we state that she's only doing this because she's like a sulking child..." No truer words... Admittedly, I only met Joan Kinney once. But that one time was more than enough. She attacked Brian and our way of life, clinging to her stupid notions without even listening to reason. I so wanted to have another go at her when she tried to steal our children away. Tell her that her beliefs were wrong, that what Brian and I share is worth more than what she had with Jack. Because this is what really bugs her, what makes her do these things. She's fucking miserable and can't stand the thought of someone else being happy. Especially Brian and Claire. After all, they are one family, right? So her children should be as dismal as she is. A mother's love – can there be anything better?

Brian is sitting in an armchair, and if it were possible, there would be smoke rising from his ears. He's pissed. And I know he's this close to taking the jeep and driving over to his dearest mother. But that would be an extremely foolish move. Mel told him as much as soon as they got here. They dropped off Gus and Jenny at Deb's, finding Brian's nephews there. Goes to show how close our family has grown, and how much Claire and the boys have become a part of it. Mel thinks that if things get really bad, Deb might turn out to be a valuable witness for Claire. She's seen the boys in action, after all. We all have. Once their homophobic thinking had been negated, they turned out to be quite nice boys. Though, there's this thing about John... I think he had more reasons than Peter for his snide remarks as far as fags are concerned. He reminds me of Chris Hobbs... I just hope Joan doesn't realise it as well, because this would make for some lovely ammunition. Her precious grandson turns queer after spending too much time with his uncle. That would be fucked, not to mention that it's not true. You either are gay, or you aren't. You don't turn gay. That was something I tried to make my father understand, and failed.

"I'm sure we can find people who would be willing to testify for us. Who will state that Joan has so many issues she never dealt with... We can tear her own testimony to shreds if need be." Great. Let's turn this into a war between family members. That'll turn out very well, indeed. But I think Claire meant what she said in Brian's office. She will turn away from her mother, and then Joanie will be all alone. Well, that serves her right. "I know she's your mother and..." Claire shakes her head and tells Mel that she doesn't have a mother anymore. See, that's exactly what I meant. Joan crossed the line, and now her children are really turning away from her. Brian already did so ages ago, but so far she still had Claire. Not anymore. Fuck, I'm not feeling sorry for the old hag, am I? Brian's right. I'm too good for this world at times. Always there to help others, always there to give people another chance.

We had this discussion after Ethan kidnapped me. Because Brian just knows what's going on in my head – something he never let on, but it was always there. Anyway, he told me that I should stop trying to make excuses for the fiddle fuck and do the healthy thing – namely hate him for what he'd done to us. And I... I just couldn't. Still can't. I mean, I really liked him at some point and thought that he could give me what Brian couldn't, or rather, wouldn't give me. Like big words, and promises, and picnics, and flowers. The only problem was that I could never feel for him what I always felt for Brian. I told myself that I was in love with Ethan, yes. But it was a lie. And I knew that, even when I left the Rage party with him. And if Mikey hadn't talked sense into me the next morning, I'd still be with him – I think. Because Brian wouldn't have come after me, even though he was fucking hurting.

And I really thought that Ethan would be happy for me, eventually. After all, he had told me to go back to Brian at one point, hadn't he? He knew all along that I would always choose Brian if given the opportunity. Who could have foreseen that he'd turn into a fucking nutcase? That he would cling to words I'd said while I was angry with Brian. That he wouldn't accept my choice. Of course I also know why Bri can't understand me as far as Ethan is concerned. He only sees him as the fiddler, the man who almost stole me away. I remember coming back to the loft, and he was there, demanding a kiss. And fuck, I could feel the anger and frustration he poured into that kiss. But most of all his fear. Fear of losing me. I wished he'd say something, other than "You stink." I guess that was the moment when he gave up, like I had weeks before. He couldn't say the words I needed to hear, because he didn't believe he was worthy of keeping me. We were so fucked up back then. And Ethan – he used his chance. I can't blame him for it.

Anyway, that's how Brian sees him. As the man who came between us. And then, when things were finally looking up, when Brian and I were on track again, when I knew how to read him again, Ethan became the man who shot Brian. The man who made me break down in the shower, blaming myself for everything that had happened. And Brian hates to see me like that. He hates the feeling of helplessness that comes over him whenever I freak out. It's been like that after the bashing, and it was the same after Brian got shot and the trial was in full swing. The only difference was that he no longer told me to go back to sleep, but made me talk about it all. Even though it cost him more than it took out of me. Every time we were talking about these things, it was fucking hard for Brian. But he was so brave. It's funny really – he still thinks he's a coward.

Then Ethan got off almost free, and kidnapped me. And if Brian hated Ethan before, he was seething now. When they found us at that fucking motel, I swear I thought for a moment that Bri would do worse to Ethan than break his nose. Oh yes, Brian hates Ian with a passion, and how can I ever make him understand that I feel sorry for Ethan? Sometimes I get the feeling that Chris Hobbs is a saint compared to Ethan – according to Brian, that is. Particularly after that little run-in I had with Hobbs brought my memories of the Prom back. And isn't that totally screwed? Chris Hobbs almost killed me. Then again, Ethan almost killed Brian, so... And that is something I will always despise him for – Ethan, I mean. Whatever he did to me... I guess I deserved it in some really roundabout and sick way. But Brian... He certainly didn't deserve to be shot for taking me back, for opening up to me in ways he never did before. Though... If it hadn't been for the shooting, he might still be fighting with those three little words... And that's an awful thing to think, I know. But I guess there's some truth in it...

"Sunshine?" Um... I'm gazing around, my eyes finally locking with confused hazel. "Where the fuck did you go off to now?" Trust me, you don't want to know. "Claire was wondering if you could help John with his art project for school. He was going to ask you himself, but since she's here..." I turn and give Claire a smile, nodding in agreement. "Good. Now that this has been taken care of... What the fuck was more important than listening to our little council of war?" Instead of an answer, he gets a kiss. And when I draw back, he seems to be ready to drop the matter. Narrow escape. I really don't want him to know how my mind works at times. And I certainly won't tell him that I've been thinking about Ethan. He might take offence to that. Or withdraw into himself, which would be worse. He pulls me close and begins to play with my hair – in front of everyone! And that is so much better than moping Brian. Been there, done that. And it sucked.

Linz is clearing her throat, and Brian turns his head to glare at her. "Well, excuse me, you two. But Justin and I have to discuss his upcoming show. Remember?" Oh yeah. That had been one of the reasons for today's lunch invitation. Brian rolls his eyes, muttering about fucking artists, but still releases me – after a more than thorough kiss that leaves me just a little breathless. And there's at least one part of my body that wants more. Brian realises that of course, and assures me that he will pay special attention to me – later. That even brings a smile to Claire's features. Mel just huffs, and pulls Brian's sister into the dining room to decide on a tactic for the upcoming visit by a Youth Welfare representative – or whatever you want to call those people. "Brian? I would prefer it if you didn't distract my most important artist, okay?" Oh, I'm her most important artist? Well, it is my very own show, so... "Go and help your sister and Mel. I promise I'll return your partner to you later on – unspoilt."

"Well, if you didn't, our son would be an orphan before the day is out." He bats his lashes at Linz, and then turns to me. "You know what to do if she wants to get friendly, yes? A little slap across the face, and then you'll come to me for help." Like I'd hit a woman. "And don't forget, she's just a crazy dyke." That reminds me of the first shower we shared. Lesbians are women – sort of. Fuck. If Linz ever heard that, she would go on about how Brian is so full of shit, etc. And she'd probably give him that special testicle massage again. Oh, I wish I had been there to see it. After Brian told me about it, I got Mel to tell me the whole story. It's hilarious really. Not for Brian, but for everyone else. That evil part in me actually hopes that Gus remembers it, on some level, and asks his Dada about it one of these days. That would be fun. Brian gives me that look, "Sunshine? You're wandering off again. Don't!" He kisses me once more, and then pushes me towards Linz, who drags me through the hall and the study into my studio.

"Honestly, Justin. I'm beginning to understand Deb. You really are ready to go at any time, aren't you?" Um, yes. So what? But if I thought she'd be ready to tear out my throat, I was sadly fucking mistaken. Because she asks, "How do you do it?" Oh no! That brings up images of lesbian sex, and that's such a turn off, it's not even remotely funny. "I mean, especially now after Jenny has been born, we haven't..." Right now, murder seems like a really good idea. I'm covering my ears, and start chanting to myself. And what does she do? She chuckles and sticks out her tongue. "See? Two can play this game. Do you seriously think that we want to see what you two are up to? Especially Mel. I mean, I know that Brian is great in bed – even when he's just with a woman. But for Mel it's like seeing the Antichrist fuck Jesus." Oh, that's nice. I'm Jesus. I grin, and she shakes her head before hugging me. "Sorry, I couldn't resist. With all the fun you have at our expense, I thought I could turn tables on you at least once."

I grumble – which is kinda hard if your still grinning, "Well, feel free to scare Brian out of his mind. But why me? I thought you loved me..." I'm pushing out my lower lips, but my pout doesn't quite work, and Lindsay is cracking up. "Oh, I'm so glad that my distress is causing you joy. I really didn't expect something like this from a fellow WASP." By now, she's laughing so hard that there are tears streaming down her cheeks. She leans against the wall, sliding down to the floor. I kneel down by her side, and finally understand why she acts this way. I gather her into my arms, stroking her hair. "I know, Linz. I'm also glad and relieved. And we'll help Claire, won't we?" She sniffs and nods. "Now... Should we look at the stuff I finished for the show?"

---

Brian

I hate the authorities. And I fucking despise Youth Welfare. And this bony thing that's sitting opposite of me right now – maybe it was a woman at some point – is slowly but steadily turning me into a raving madman. Apparently, they weren't too impressed by what they found at Claire's home. Well, no surprise there. She simply can't be expected to provide the boys with a palace with the little money she has at her disposal. And then there were the things they found in John's room. Oh, I hope Joanie hears about it. That'll be the last straw. Maybe she'll even have a heart attack and die. At least then she wouldn't be able to cause us any more grief. It's cosmic justice, I think. My formerly fag-hating nephew is a fairy himself. The cunt from Youth Welfare didn't seem to see the humour in it, though. And now it's of course the evil gay uncle who turned God's child into – what was it again? – ah yes, an abomination. Really, what has Justin's car to do with all this?

Anyway, the skeleton just asked me to tell, um, it about my nephews. Now that should be fun. Or better not. I want to help Claire, after all, not play into my mother's hands. "Oh, I'm sure you've already heard that they were little demons until recently, so I'll skip that part." I smirk, but the skeleton is clearly not amused. "Honestly, they are doing great. After my sister, how to put it... After Claire parted ways with my mother's doctrine, John and Peter have learnt what the word 'family' really means. My partner helped them to see the errors in my mother's teachings, and ever since then, they have become more or less normal kids. John used to have those anger spells, and they are gone for good, I'd say." I smile. "Probably because he no longer thinks that he's a pervert because he likes boys..." Nope, the skeleton has no humour at all.

"So you approve of your nephew's sexual orientation? You don't think it's too soon for him to make such a choice?" Fuck! What is it with people? I want to yell at – okay, I'll be nice – at her, want to tell her that being gay isn't a disease or something like that. But then... "Don't get me wrong, Mr Kinney. I don't share the beliefs of some of my colleagues. One of my best friends is in fact a lesbian, so... But you must understand how John's preferences could be used against your sister." Um. What? "Once your mother figures this out – and she will, I have no doubt about that – she will see it as proof. And she will use it to show that Claire is anything but a good mother." I think my eyes are bulging. I just can't believe what I'm hearing. "I'm not your enemy here. But I won't be able to help you if you don't help me..." She wants to help us?

"As I was saying, they both are much calmer now. They got to meet their cousin, and they seem to really enjoy being with him. Only..." I chuckle at the memory, "they are a little scared of my partner's sister. But other than that they love their new family. And they have told their grandmother. Which is the only reason we are here right now. She could never stand the thought of someone being happy if she couldn't even be content. John and Peter aren't her puppets anymore, and she hates that. Maybe you should check on her as well. And don't forget to ask her why she told them that I hated them." Ms Murphy – skeleton's real name – is gaping. "You didn't know that, did you? She used every chance to tell them how depraved all gays were, and once she found out I was one of them, she made me out to be a monster." And even though I would never admit it, that was something that really hurt. That she would use kids in her fight against me.

"I didn't know that. But rest assured that I will make a note of it." She scribbles something down. "So, let me sum up: You think the boys have changed for the better, and that the home they are in right now is the best they could get." I nod. "Alright. And I'll make sure that someone has a look into your mother's life. I'll also drop by your sister's house again, to undo some of the damage Patricia has done. She's just..." Ms Murphy sighs, "I think she's pretty much like your mother. Places like Liberty Avenue are hell on earth according to her." I repeat, I don't believe what I'm hearing. But I do hear the knock on my office door just like I see Justin's blond head appear a moment later. Ms Murphy smiles, "Well, I shall leave you to your partner, Mr Kinney." She hands me her card, "If you wish to add anything to the things you've told me, be sure to call me." And then she's gone, and I'm wondering if I've been hit by a freight train just now.

Justin stares at me. "Um, what was that?" I can only mouth 'Youth Welfare', still too startled to form a proper sentence. "Shit." I shake my head. No, Sunshine. She might be able to really help us. "So... How did it go? She could leave your office on her own, so that must be a good sign. Then again, you look pretty spooked." No shit. I'm caught in one of those horror movies he likes to watch during a thunderstorm. I close my eyes and draw a deep breath. "Bri?" His voice is closer now, and when I crack my eyes open again, they lock with his. "You're scaring me here." Oh, we can't have that. I reach up and drag him down for a kiss, which ends with him sitting in my lap, stroking my hard cock, while my hands are busy within his pants. "Oh fuck, Bri!" Yup, that sounds loads better. He shudders and comes all over my hand – and his cargos. Oh well, too bad. Unfortunately I'm not faring any differently, and that's fucked. My nice Armani pants... "So..." he purrs, "how did it go?"

Shit! So much for taking his mind off things. "It was – as you put it – spooky. She's actually willing to really help us. You know, she isn't one of those fucking homophobic bitches." He grins. "And she will take a look at dear old Mom." Now Justin is the one who sports the startled expression. "Come on, Sunshine. Let's go home. Mikey called, they are back, and he wants to meet at Woody's later on. But before we can go there, I have an itch, and I need you to scratch it..." I wiggle my eyebrows, and he slaps me, calling me Mr Single-mindedness. I shrug. "So far I didn't get the impression that you mind. However, I'm sure I can find someone else..." He growls, and suddenly I'm pinned to my chair by a pissed off nineteen-year-old. Well, I guess he has to enjoy his final days as a teenager, because in only four days, he will turn twenty.

When we get to Woody's, Mikey is grinning like the Cheshire Cat, and even the professor looks smug. I guess Mel has already told them what she managed to achieve. I just wish they hadn't brought the little plague along with them. The fucking hustler seems to have developed a crush on me, and while it's nice to irk Justin, he's really getting on my nerves. Particularly since he welcomes us with, "Hi, Brian. Wanna fuck?" Then he turns to Justin, "Piss off and let a professional handle this." He throws himself at me, trying to give me a kiss, and I'm forced to push him away rather forcefully before drawing my partner close enough to devour his mouth. "You call that a kiss? I could do better..."

That's Mikey and Ben's cue to drag him away and give him a sermon. Well, he deserves it. Little shit. I really don't know why they couldn't pick up a little kitty if they wanted a stray. Justin kisses my neck right beneath my ear, and I'm almost rock-hard just from that. "He's truly a piece of work, isn't he?" Who? Hunter? Oh yes. "But I like the way you show him that I'm your everything, that you're not missing anything..." He bats his lashes, and I can barely stifle my chuckle. Mikey doesn't even try, but bursts out laughing like a fucking loony. "Hey Mikey, hey Ben." Justin drops down on one of the empty chairs. "Bri? Get us something to drink? Please?" Who am I? His fucking maid? But I'm still going to the bar to get us both a beer. When I return to the table, he smiles at me seductively, and I know that he's going to show me his appreciation once we get home. Why did we have to stay again?

Mikey reaches for his coat and retrieves both Justin's keys and my credit card. "Thank you, guys. I don't know what I would have done without you." I think I hear Ben mumble something under his breath, something like "Do the smart thing and stay?" I guess he is right. But we are talking about Mikey here, aren't we. And Mikey doesn't do the smart thing, ever. Unless, of course, he tells Justin to stop being a fucking idiot and get back to the loft. Now that one was a moment of brilliance. "Mel told us what went on while we were away. Your mother must be out of her mind, Brian. To think that she'd achieve anything by this except for alienating herself even more." It's the booze, Mikey. It damaged her brain. Sometimes I think the same happened with me, or how do you explain that I'm suddenly Mr Family Guy living a monogamous life with my non-husband – and on top of that, I'm actually loving it all! And I love my personal twink! That's so fucked.

"When I got to Brian's office today, he had just finished a chat with one of those Youth Welfare people. He said that she might be able to really help us." Justin takes a swing from his bottle before setting it in front of him again. "They might actually turn the whole thing against Brian's mother, because if anyone was putting ideas into the boys' heads, it was her." Now I'm remembering why I'm with him. He's a fucking genius. "She's not one of those homophobes, and seemed to be genuinely interested in this case. Well, we'll see how it'll turn out. But..." he glances at Mikey, "I think we could make this one of the topics of the next Rage issue. You know, about narrow-minded authorities, that are only following their own agenda..." Mikey nods, and they are lost to us. Ben just sighs – apparently he's familiar with this. Well, he should be. They are usually working over at their place. Because I'm not allowing them to turn the living room – or worse, the study – into a battlefield. Had enough of that when they started to work on Rage. Okay, okay. What really bugged me back then was that they shared something I wasn't part of. So what? I'm not perfect.

Hunter is catching my eye again, motioning towards the bathrooms. Okay, that's it. I look at Ben, and he nods. Alright then. I smile at Hunter, and he follows me to the men's room. But instead of getting the fuck of his life he'd been expecting, I'm shoving him into the wall. "This ends here and now. You are something like a son to my best friend, which already means that you're off limits. But there's also the fact that I'm in a relationship, in case you haven't noticed yet. A monogamous relationship. So, next time you want to hit on me, think again." I let go of him, and he slumps to the floor. Too bad. When we finally bid the little family goodbye – three hours after we got to Woody's – the little hustler only mutters "See you" and that's that.