Notes: This is my story for the Queer as Folk Holiday Gift Exchange.

Molly

"Why don't you step inside for a second? I promise no one's going to bite you." And that's really true for once. Mom's in this fucking pathetic Christmas mood, Tucker's out to get ... something, and my beloved brother is sitting in the living room making out with Brian. He's finally come to his senses and claimed what had been his for years. With that in mind, I decide that it really should be safe if he waits in the hall while I run up to get the present I got for him and Mi – you-don't-have-to-call-me-mom – chelle. I should have known better.

When I come down, I can already hear Dad shouting, and moments later I see him and Brian almost ripping each others hair out. And Justin... He's still sitting on the sofa, shock and pain evident in his eyes. I really hate it that Dad can hurt him so much with just a few well-placed words. I might have been young when Justin first met Brian, but I still caught a thing or two. And later ... later Dad tried everything he could to make me see things his way. Only, it wasn't working. Cause if you don't squeeze your eyes shut really hard, you only have to look at the two of them to know that what they share isn't wrong. Though I still think it's totally gross when Brian feels like sharing certain details...

"...perverted bastard who ripped my son's innocence from him and turned him into an ... an abomination. A sodomite who turned from his family to pursue the same depraved lifestyle you probably always have. Without you, he could lead a normal life! You stole that from him, and condemned him to burn in the Eternal Fires..." Oh shit! Dad, you really don't know what you just unleashed, do you? Justin's slowly rising to his feet, his hand finding Brian's without a glance – like I said, they're meant to be – and the glare he sends Dad's way... If he was smart at all, he'd run for cover right about now. Because while Brian will rip you a new one if you only think about hurting Justin, it's my so innocent-looking brother you want to watch out for. A lesson Dad's about to learn the hard way.

"A normal life? That's what you want for me? Well, here's a newsflash for you: I am leading a normal life. I have a partner I can always rely on and who has loved me since," he turns to Brian, smirking, "the day we first met." Brian's rolling his eyes, but I can see that he's fighting damn hard to keep the grin off his face. He'd say his life is totally fucked up because of all the romance-shit Justin forces on him, but we all know he wouldn't change a single thing. And neither would Justin. Why can't Dad see that? Justin goes on, "I've been married for two years, have the best friends imaginable ... oh, and I make quite a bit of cash with what you once called a 'waste of both time and money'. Not to mention our son. The son I named right after he was born. All that sounds pretty normal to me... And if you can't see it that way, that's your problem. And I don't give a shit about it. However..." and from his tone of voice I can tell that he's going in for the kill now, "if you ever attack a member of my family again..." He doesn't have to go on. Even someone with the IQ of a tree trunk would get the threat.

Justin's now facing Brian again, softly cupping his beautiful – yes, I still have a mild crush on my brother-in-law, sue me – beautiful face, the platinum band on his ring finger almost glowing in the light of the Christmas tree. "And just for your information, Brian didn't rip anything from me. That first night, I had more than one opportunity to call it all off. But I didn't want to. I wanted to be with him, still do... And I didn't turn from my family, Dad. It's you who turned from me. As for burning in Hell, I've already been there. Several times. Even though I thought I was where I wanted to be back then." He's talking about Ethan, L.A. and New York now. "Hell isn't some stupid pit of fire, Dad. Hell is living in that empty place inside yourself because the most important part of your life is missing." He's looking at Dad one last time, "If you ask me, you've been in Hell ever since you lost Mom." Then he turns back to Brian, and they continue where they left off when Dad stormed in.

And he ... he looks shell-shocked. Well, he's never seen this Justin. The strong and proud man he's become over the years. The man who will tear you to shreds if you so much as insinuate that something's wrong with his family. Brian's bad, but compared to Justin he's a choirboy. Dad stares at me now, slowly shaking his head, "We ... we better postpone this. I have to get back to the office..." On Christmas Eve – yeah, sure. But maybe there are a few things he wants to think about now. Who knows? I simply nod and hand him the little parcel I almost forgot I was holding. And then he's gone, without so much as a Merry Christmas.

"Well, I guess that had to happen one of these days..." That's Mom now, looking as pissed as can be. You know, for a decent and honourable WASP-mom she can be quite ... outspoken you could say. I guess being around Brian Kinney will do that to you, and she's been around him a lot over the last nine years. By now, they are partners in crime more often than not, much to Justin's chagrin. Speaking of my brother – he's currently being treated to Mom's death hug – she picked that up from Debbie – while whispering into his ear, loud enough for us all to hear. "I'm so proud of you. You ... the way you stood up to him... " I know she still feels bad about certain things that happened ages ago – like being unable to pay for P.I.F.A. and stuff like that. But really, that was so long ago it's not even true anymore.

"Now, now, Mother Taylor. Don't suffocate your firstborn." Brian's eyes are twinkling and he looks so proud... "Even though I have to say his little performance just now was quite impressive." Justin grins at that, but not his stupid Sunshine smile, no. He grins like the cat who ate the canary... "Though I fear it means he's finally growing into his own... Who knows? In a few years, he won't be needing us anymore..." Yeah, I can just see that happening. Not!

---

Brian

He shuts the door and sets the alarm, providing me with an opportunity I'd been waiting for all evening. You would think that since Jen is in wedlock once again, there would be some decent booze at their lovely little suburban home. But of course she had to go and marry a straight version of Zen-Ben, who thinks a glass of red wine gives you enough of a kick, so why bother with the harder stuff? Jen – knowing me – at least makes an attempt, but she simply doesn't get distinctions between the good and the bad stuff. Even though Justin told her time and again... Well, never mind. I still have my very own stash of Beam and Chivas, not to mention the bottle of Single Malt Scotch Whisky Justin gave me for our anniversary, and which must have cost him a fucking fortune. Anyway, while Justin secures Britin, I'm getting the shot I needed since Daddy-dear showed up.

I really could have done without that shouting match, and the trip down memory lane my brain's now embarking on. The way Justin stood up to Craig after the initial shock ... just like that night so many years ago when I was so fucking sure he'd go, "Gee, it was fun while it lasted, but you don't seriously think I'd choose an emotional cripple such as yourself over my family?!" But he didn't. On the contrary. And it was in that moment, just before he told his father that he'd never come home again that I realised ... if not that I loved him, then at least that I wanted him around, that losing him wasn't something I'd be able to simply brush aside. And then he ... and I got such a kick out of it, like I did again today. And hadn't all that shit with Deb come up, I'd have showed him how fucking proud I was of him, how relieved I was... Maybe.

I know that it's fucking hard for Justin, it was back then and it still is now. All his life he'd known a father who loved him. And then suddenly... I'm sure he kept hoping that one day... Sorry, Sunshine. But your dad won't change his mind, certainly not as long as I'm in the picture. And I've no intention of leaving. So you might want to accept it. Actually, I think he finally began to do just that today...

"Drinking alone again? I thought we got over that..." He takes the glass from me, only to hand it back moments later – empty, of course. "I needed that..." Uh-huh. "I ... I really don't know why I still thought he'd come around..." Cause he's your father, and despite all the shit he's put you through he's still a million times better than Jack. "But when he started off with his usual normal life shit, I just ... I couldn't take it anymore. Cause who the fuck wants normal if they can screw Brian Kinney on a regular basis?" His eyes are twinkling mischievously, and I can only roll mine. Because he's fucking right, damn it. I didn't plan it, and neither did he, but it somehow happened when he decided we'd been tricking enough to last us two or maybe even three lifetimes, and a monogamous relationship really was the way to go. It would have been unfair to force him to forsake a large part of his personality by making him bottom at all times, so... Besides, he had a damn good teacher, so he's not half-bad as a top.

"I'm just sorry for Molly..." Huh? "You know Dad pays her tuition fees. What if..." Then Craig Taylor is more stupid than certain idiotic ad-execs who needed seven years to claim what they always wanted. Or one pathetically dumb fiddler, who simply didn't realise what he had. Shit, even I had gotten that much, already before the Prom... But I can't tell Justin any of this because he always takes offence when I beat myself up over my past mistakes.

So I just shrug, "She still has her terribly handsome and sexy brother-in-law, who has a history of paying the fees for the Taylor offspring..." His eyes grow large, "Oh, for fuck's sake! It's not as if I hadn't offered to do that before." Yeah, cause I never felt very good about Dad paying for Molly's education. I guess I always thought that it couldn't last since she's pretty much involved in our depraved and unchristian world. She's even joined PFLAG, poor girl. Next thing, she'll become a permanent fixture at the GLC, where the losers gather to discuss terribly important issues like "Babylon, Kingdom of the Promiscuous and Vain – How Can We Get Rid of It?". I think they got the shock of their pathetic excuses for a life when word got out that the owner of Babylon had tied the knot with his lover of seven years. Tannis – my special friend – probably got a heart attack...

"You'd really do that?" Which part of "I offered before Daddy-dear did" doesn't he get? "I mean, I hope it won't come to it, but... How can I ever thank you enough for this?" Oh, I have a few ideas. I'm drawing him close, but just before our lips meet, I push him down to his knees. He grins at me, eyes sparkling, and I swear, he's fucking drooling.

"You can start by sucking me off. You teased me all evening, it's really the least you can do." He moans, licking his lips. "Then we'll go upstairs, where you'll finger-fuck your hole, stretching and lubing it until it's ready for my big, hard cock... Any questions?" He's already busy undoing my pants, so I guess the answer's "no". Fuck, my dick feels ready to burst, which isn't exactly surprising considering... Oh shit! He's swallowing me to the root, and I've to bite the inside of my cheek to keep from coming. I taught him too well. His eyes are closed as he inhales deeply, and then he begins to bob his head up and down, and I can't keep from staring. He's so fucking hot, kneeling in front of me, blowing me as if there's nothing he'd rather be doing. I really don't know how I ever managed to watch him with someone else without freaking out. How I could stand by while another guy fucked him or fed him his dick. I guess I thought it was hot then, but now...

Now his still slightly cold fingers begin to massage my ball – okay, he's also treating that stupid piece of plastic... He swallows around my cock, and that's all it takes. Through the haze I see him rub his still-clothed crotch, and I want to stop him, but I can't manage even the little, monosyllabic word "no". Fuck! How come he can still reduce me to this after all these years? Maybe Mikey and Linz were right all along and the longer you are with someone...

Another swipe of his tongue and he's tucking me back into my pants – but not for long, Sunshine. Not for long. He's getting up with a groan, and I simply have to comment. "Getting old?" He's giving me the finger – I guess I deserved that – and scampers off into the hall and up the stairs. "Hey, Sunshine!" He turns halfway up and raises his eyebrow. "Don't jerk off before I join you. You know, old people need more time to recuperate..." Shit. The expression on his face is priceless. Like he doesn't quite believe I've said that. Then he sticks out his tongue, which makes him look about five, turns and resumes his ascent.

"Don't take too long, or I might just do that..." The little shit knows of course why I didn't join him right away. It's because I have to check the alarm again since he's the most precious thing in my life and I have to make sure he's safe. Yeah, my protectiveness is bordering obsession, but it's his own damn fault. If he hadn't been robbed in New York... But today, everything's okay, and I can go upstairs to claim my prize – like every night.

The sight that greets me when I finally push open the door of the master bedroom is more than enough inspiration for my dick. It's pulsing once more, straining against the soft material of my pants... He's on the bed, naked, staring at me. His ass is slowly swallowing the fingers of his right hand while his left is gliding over the smooth planes of his chest. His pupils are dilated, and each time he's pinching one of his nipples, a hiss escapes his lips. His lips... Cherry red, made for kissing. My last coherent thought before I lose it for a while is that I have to taste them. Now!

Then it's all need and want, and touch and feel, and I'm only returning to my body just before I push into his pliant body. His legs are on my shoulders just like ... like that first night. There's just one difference. We found a new way to be safe – no more tricking. Works like a charm, and the money I'm saving cause I no longer have to stock up on condoms... Not to mention the perks. That feeling of being swallowed whole by his heated body, skin on skin with nothing separating us anymore. Literally and figuratively. There's no more reason to hold back. He's seen the worst of me, and still he stayed...

Suddenly, I remember something else from that night, something I'd have denied even if my life had depended on it. Well, I won't this time. So I hold back a little, force myself to forget about how incredible it feels to be buried balls-deep in his ass, and bring him to the edge with a few, well-placed thrusts. And then, just when he's about to lose it, I lean down and whisper into his ear, "I love you, Justin." Who'd have ever guessed that those few words could cause such a violent reaction? He's throwing his head back against the cushions and comes in long, milky strands all over our chests. And if that's not enough to finish me off, the muscles in his ass squeeze down on me, pulling my orgasm from me.

I'm slumping down on him, needing to catch my breath. Needing to ... to breathe in our scent. But I must be crushing him. So I force myself to roll off and he groans as his legs drop to the mattress. And that ... I just can't let the opportunity pass. "You really are getting old." Fuck! He's got a mean left hook, and this was the playful version.

I rub my breastbone – which is where his fist landed – and he snickers. "So, tell me ... is there anything else I can do for you today?" Not just today, Sunshine. Not just today.

But right now there are a few things I want him to do, or rather, things I want to do to him. However, I'll need a little while before I'm ready for another mind-blowing fuck, and there is a question that's been bugging me. "Well, you could explain why the fuck we have to host this year's Christmas dinner..." He giggles, laces our fingers and begins...